2 1/2 weeks Postpartum

So it has been a little while since Lex made his arrival and I've had major surgery and I wanted to update as to how we are both doing. Lex is growing like a weed, and at his last appointment (1 week old), he had gained 3 ounces in 2 days!! Amazing! My milk has come in strong, since the day after we were discharged, and I've been able to pump every day, as to have a stash for when I go back to work. I think Lex is past the 7 pound mark now, he seems so much heavier. He also looks like a baby now, not a newborn. He is a pro sleeper, and only has the occasional night where he wakes up more than twice. His usual sleeping pattern is once he's down for the night, he will sleep between 4-6 hours straight, then wakes up to get changed, eat, and then he's down again for at least another 2 hours. Then he wakes up, gets changed, eats, and has another major nap, usually 2-3 hours. It's been so nice, for both Ken and I. There have only been a few times since Lex has been born that Ken and I have have been baffled and stressed about his crying. He really is a wonderful, calm baby, and I couldn't ask for anything more. I am so in love with my son!
As for myself, I am doing very well. The surgery was scary obviously, and I'm glad we were given an extra day at the hospital. Moving anything at all hurt, and something as simple as turning over in bed was difficult. It made me very upset one night, while Ken was asleep (he had been up for too long and couldn't keep his eyes open), and Lex was in his bassinet, and started to cry. I couldn't get out of bed to answer his cry... I had to rely on the nurse to give him to me so I could comfort him. And it made me so sad, to know that at that moment, I couldn't take care of my own baby.
Since we've been home, I have been much better. I haven't had to take anything stronger than ibuprofen since like day 3 home, and getting around has become much easier. I've been able to not only take care of Lex, but also somewhat take care of my home as well. At my follow up appointment to check my incision, Dr Dickson was very pleased and said I will barely have any scar at all, that I'm healing very well. I do have some nerve damage obviously, so part of my tummy near the incision is numb. The numbness has improved in the last week or so, but it is still a dulled sensation. I hope to get most of it back, but I guess we will see.
I had my mother in law here from California for a week (she arrived right after we were home) , which was a huge help. It was nice not to worry about making dinner, or dishes being done, or the floor being dirty, at least for a little while. We hadn't seen her in 3 years, so it was nice to be able to visit again and hear how Ken's family is doing.
Ken has been also amazing, and is the best daddy to my son I could ever ask for. He goes back to work tomorrow night, and I'm not ready. Granted, he had a lot more time off than we both thought he would, but it will still be hard without him here. And on that note, I am dreading going back to work, only because I know it will be so hard for me to leave him, even if it is on the other side of the wall and with a coworker I trust completely. It will take some getting used to not only getting myself ready but Lex ready as well. It will be ok, just takes practice. Here is one of Lex's first pictures:

Birth Story

Well, Lex is currently napping, so I figured I would take the time to update. Lex is obviously here, and made his grand entrance on Sept 4th. So here goes the story:

Woke up early on the 3rd in order to get to the hospital at 8 am. Was admitted with only a little wait, and had Ken and my mom all set up to wait out my labor with me. By 8:30 or so, Dr Dickson came in and decided the best way to start the induction was to break my water, and moniter my contractions and Lex's heartbeat. Breaking my water hurt a little, but the result was pretty gross, I'm sorry. Feeling like you're peeing your pants every time you move even slightly got old, very quickly. The nurses were great though, and definitely made me feel better about what was going on.
I started to feel contractions soon after, although they were very mild. Lex was still doing great. It was pretty easy until around 6 pm or so, even though I wasn't progressing very fast. I believe at that point, I was still at like a 3cm and Lex was still a -2. Lex was tuned wrong (sunny side up), so there was a lot of back pain when I did have a contraction, and they progressively snaked around to my tummy area. By 6 or so, I was pretty tired, and the contractions, while not overly painful yet, were making me exhausted. I requested some type of pain management, and was given a shot of fentynol, just to take the edge off. We were all able to catch a little bit of sleep, which felt awesome.
Contractions came on very strong and often after the shot wore off. I guess because Lex was turned wrong as well, my contractions came up as a wave pattern, called coupling. I didn't get a break in between each contraction, so I could have 3 or 4 stacked on top of each other. Ken as amazing though, and stayed by my side the entire time, helping me stay focused with breathing and hand squeezing.
Some friends came in around 8:30, to visit (or so I thought). They even brought grapes, crackers, and juice for mom and Ken. It was nice to see them and visit, although it was right in the middle of my strongest contractions, so they really got to see the labor process haha. I thought they had come just to see how I was doing, and would return when Lex was born. But they had decided they were camping out, and not leaving until he was born. I have the best friends! The nurses even let them stay in a postpartum room to hang out and sleep while I was laboring.
The pain was getting very intense, and I asked for a epidural, which was a heaven send. That allowed Ken, myself, and my mom some rest, since it looked like we were in for the long haul. It was coming up on midnight and I was still only at 5 cm, and thankfully Lex had moved to a -1 station. Not a whole lot though for being in labor about 16 hours already.
I drifted in and out of sleep, Ken was sleeping like a log on the daddy bed, and my mom was trying to rest in an armchair, while listening to Lex's heart monitor. Around 2:45ish in the morning (while I'm still half asleep) I hear my mom yell "BABY IS IN DISTRESS!!!" and my room gets flooded with nurses. They have me flip on my side, then try to get on my hands and knees (which was impossible having being numb from the waist down) and then flip on my other side. I guess Lex's heart rate had dropped very suddenly from the 140's into the 60's. Obviously something was wrong.
5 minutes after that, my nurse said that Dr Dickson was calling it, and they were going to prep me for an emergency c-section. The one thing I didn't want to happen, was happening. My mom was crying, which made me cry, and I was trying my best to stay calm to keep Lex from having more trouble. Within 15 minutes or less, I was being wheeled out of my room and into the OR, completely numb from the chest down. I am so thankful that my friends were there camping out, they helped my mom be ok instead of being by herself while I was in surgery.
I said a short prayer as they were getting ready, I had an awful feeling about the surgery and was obviously very scared about myself and about Lex. Ken came in shortly after and held my hand the entire time. I ended up throwing up several times during the surgery, and it was scary as well, because I was so numb, I felt like I couldn't breathe. I know the feeling already from my asthma, but it was 20 times worse. Very scary. I was also so very sleepy, it was so hard to keep focused and keep my eyes open. I'm not sure if it was a reaction from the medication or just the temperature in the OR, but on top of all that, I had uncontrollable shaking.  My jaw and mouth started to hurt from my teeth chattering.
Lex was born at 335 am on the 4th, and hearing his first cry was one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard. Ken kept talking to me about his crying, and I couldn't help but cry. They had Ken go with Lex soon after, and had him change his first diaper and get his weight. 6 pounds, 14 ounces. So small! Stitching me up took longer than I expected, and all I wanted as to see my baby. Ken was able to bring him to me and hold him next to my head, and that made me start crying all over again. He was absolutely beautiful! As soon as I was stitched up, they wheeled me into recovery and I was able to see Lex fully and look at all his little details. They warmed me up and made sure I was ok, then they layed Lex on my chest for skin on skin and first time breastfeeding. Lex took to feeding like a pro, and the nurse was surprised, she made the comment "You could teach other babies to do this!".    
Soon after, around 5:30 or so, we were wheeled into postpartum, where my friends and mom were waiting. My mom was first, and 4 of my friends got to hold Lex within hours of him being born, which was so very special. My mom ended up staying a few more hours after my friends left (around 6:30 am) to let Ken and I sleep, which was a huge blessing. She also got to bond with Lex, which I know is so important to her, although she was up for over 28 hours at that point.
We ended up staying at the hospital until friday night, just to make sure Lex and I were both ok. You never know how much you use your stomach muscles until you can't anymore!
Lex is perfectly healthy, and although his entrance to the world was long and a bit scary, he is here and I am so in love, I can't believe it. He is perfect!

Next time I have some time, I will update about our hospital stay and how my healing is going.

41 weeks

Well, obviously little Lex is not here yet. Currently overdue by a week, and Ken and I have decided that if he doesn't decide to come on his own by Tuesday, we're going ahead with an induction. I wish I could give him more time, but being in FMLA kind of limits the timeline of him getting here and me being able to take as much time as I want and being comfortable going back to work.
I am officially on maternity leave, and it's nice to know that I have dinners in the freezer ready to go, and laundry can wait for a while if I need it to, since neither Ken or I need work uniforms for at least 2 weeks. I've been working on cleaning the house from top to bottom. One, to help me stay active and encourage labor to start, and two, if we do have to induce, I want to come home to a clean house and not stress about dishes or a dirty carpet. Which I know I will unless I do everything now.
I wish we had a few more things for Lex, but honestly they can wait, at least a little longer. I wanted to have a new changing pad and covers (the one I had in the garage is kind of torn up, it will suffice but new would be better, and I have no covers for it), and I wanted to have a hamper in his room too. The hamper can wait though, I know.

My appetite sure have improved this last week though, I can't stop eating! If anyone know me personally at all, they know I can eat 3-4 bites of dinner and be stuffed. Normal for me. So when I get home from work, and can eat a hamburger, an english muffin, strawberries, a small bowl of cereal, a glass of juice, and 3 glasses of water on top of it within 2-3 hour span... yeah. I think Lex is growing!! It's been like this for over a week now, I feel like I'm back in the second trimester.

It's kind of surreal at this point, to know that by Tuesday, for sure, this little boy will be here. Not just here, but like HERE. Out of me and like a real life baby. Oh my GOSH!! It blows my mind! Can't wait!

1 day late

Well, my due date came and went on Sunday. Nothing really happened, some slight Braxton Hicks but other than that, pretty uneventful. I have another dr appt tomorrow, and she did offer to sweep my membranes, and Ken would like me to, just to see if it will work to get labor going... but I'm kind of on the fence. I've heard it hurts, a lot, and having to work right afterward probably would not be good. Plus there is no promise it even works.
I'm going to ask tomorrow about how long they will let me go before we schedule an induction. I'm thinking it won't be much longer than this week. And even if it is, I think I'm going to go on maternity leave after this week. I am getting so tired, so quickly, and even the smaller kids are getting really hard to lift. My boss supports that decision as well, which is nice. I did end up turning in my FMLA request paperwork late, so I hope that doesn't screw something up.
Overall, Ken and I (and even Andy) are ready for this baby to be here. The time has come!

39 week Update

How far along: 39 weeks, 1 day

How big is baby: weighs about 7 pounds, and about 20 inches long

I have been feeling: Not too bad, just feeling huge! My stress level is good, just kind of worried about when the big moment will happen! Ready for Lex to be here, not ready for all of what labor will entail.

Total weight gain/loss? A little less than 20 pounds now, I can't remember eactly

Maternity clothes? Love them

Sleep? still not bad, turning over is rather difficult though

Best moment this week? Finally feeling like everything is ready for the baby to get here

Food cravings? Not craving really, but my appetite has been huge in the last week or two. I feel like I want to eat everything!

Food aversions?  none lately

Gender? Boy all the way!

Labor signs? none yet that I can tell, last Dr appt I had, was no dilation, no effacement, and it's just been a lot of Braxton Hicks.

Belly button in or out? Neither? It's not in or out, just kind of flat haha

What I miss? cold deli sandwiches... wearing my wedding rings on my finger... being comfortable in any kind of aspect!

What I'm looking forward to? The call to Ken letting him know I'm actually in labor

I'm worried about: what labor will be like exactly, being induced

Bump? Feeling stretched to capacity right now!

Next appointment: Tomorrow, the 20th. Hoping for some change at all!

38 weeks

Well I started my 38th week on Sunday, and boy is this kiddo getting big! My Dr measured my fundal height today and the first thing she said was "oh wow!". Hope he's not getting too big! There has been no change in either dilation or effacement since the 30th, so I'm guessing he still has some baking to do. He is head down though, and I got to see a quick profile today on an ultrasound, Dr Dickson wanted to confirm he hasn't flipped back up. It was only about 2 seconds, but I love it. Nice to see his face again. I'm really wondering what his features will be, something I think about a lot now.
Ken and I went to the mall to get him a suit jacket for an interview on Saturday, and about halfway though our shopping, my tummy started to hurt a lot! It started in one area, and moved to two different places by the time we got back to the car. It stopped as soon as I would sit or lay down, but for the rest of the night, any time I tried to stand up and move, I got a tightening and soreness feeling all over. Made the night difficult. It went away the following morning, and Dr Dickson confirmed today it was just Braxton Hicks. I had some bad Braxton Hicks again this afternoon, unfortunately at work, coupled with a caffeine headache, made for a miserable afternoon. I'm still going to work as long as I can, but if these continue like that, I may have to go on FMLA sooner than I want. It's pretty impossible to work the way I need to with contractions going on.
My stress level has gone way down since my last post, I was able to help out my brother last Saturday, chores in exchange for some cash, and he really helped knock out my to do list before Lex gets here.
I do have a new slight stress though, but there is nothing I can really do about it. If things work out with this interview Ken had today, he will have a new job in the near future. Which makes me stress a little about insurance. There is always a time period before benefits start, and the timing of the new job and Lex's arrival may be kind of scary. I really don't want to pay for his birth out of pocket!!  Nothing I can do about it, but it makes me nervous. I guess we will have to wait and see what happens.
Unfortunately, due to finances and her trying to get a new job, Cyndi (my MIL) will not be able to come up for his first weeks of life. I'm ready and willing to buy her plane ticket, but finances are really tight for Ken's parents, and Cyndi really needs a job, so the timing doesn't work. Hopefully she will get up here sooner rather than later, before he's too old. Ken, Andy and I have talked about taking a road trip down there with Lex though, so there is always that possibility. 
Oh, good news though, we have the car seat installed in the car, and the stroller together and ready to go. Yay! I forgot what the pattern looked like when I bought it a few years ago, and I was surprised, it was different than I thought, but in a good way!

38 week picture!

36 weeks

Well I had my 36 week appointment on Tuesday, and Lex is still growing strong. My Dr said that he is getting big, and his heartbeat is still going strong, was in the 150's this time. She also said I'm dilated already (either 1/2 inch or 1 inch, I can't remember what she said now after the fact!), and she doesn't think I'm going to make it to my due date. I know it's more of a guessing game, but maybe the due date was wrong, and that was why Lex seems big? Possible. I need to finish some details with the packing of the hospital bag, but that is pretty much ready too. Kind of freaking out just slightly that he could come at any time... really hoping I don't go into labor at work, that kind of freaks me out.

I'm starting to feel better about getting prepped, there is very little left to get, it's more organizing everything and some extra cleaning, which shouldn't be too bad. Oh and figuring out how to install the car seats. I'm still feeling really good, and my energy is pretty good still as well. My hands and feet are swollen pretty much all of the time now, so I've switched my wedding rings to my necklace.

So overall, things are going much better, and beyond my worry about when and where I will go into labor, I'm feeling pretty positive about everything.

Progress

It may be a little thing, but all of Lex's clothes are officially organized!! Washed, dried, sorted, and organized in his room. I was also able to meal prep 6 meals today, which is a huge relief. Even if I can get 20 meals prepped and ready, I will feel better. I think 20 is a good goal before he gets here in 5ish weeks.
I also made a list of all the things we still really need (which isn't as much as I thought, a lot of stuff would be nice but this list is more of things I'll worry about if we don't get it before he gets here or very soon thereafter), and after this week I'm going to tackle my to do list on the fridge. At least the things i can do myself. I talked to Ken today about how overwhelmed I've been feeling, and he promised to help in the next few weeks. Definitely made me feel better.
Still have a few things to get together for the maternity photo shoot, but that will be easy to prep for. Not quite sure how I'll get a chance to do my hair the way I want it to be after working all day that day, but between my mom, the photographer, and myself, we'll figure it out.
I also started packing the mom and dad bags for the hospital today, and I think I'm about half way there. I need to get some extra toiletries I think, and pack some extra clothing and things for Lex, but after that, I can scratch that off the list too.

I'm definitely starting to feel better, even though it still seems like time is running out! 5 weeks! Unless he's late, but even then, 6 weeks maybe?? Eek! Excited and nervous at the same time!

Terrified

Ok is it normal for a mommy to be so overwhelmed and worried/terrified at this stage in the pregnancy? I feel like there is not enough. Not enough time, too much to do, not enough money, too much to buy still, not enough ready yet, too much to think about. Too much to worry about, as for the hospital, getting ready for labor, how I'm going to get everything prepped in a timely manner, the worries for what happens after my leave is over and I have to go back to work....

AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day, between work, commuting, dinner making, and spending time with my husband for little else regarding to cleaning, organizing, meal prep, or budgeting. 

I still feel like there are a lot of things that little Lex will need before he gets here, or soon thereafter, but trying to figure out how to pay for it is driving me crazy. Ken and I are having a hard enough time budgeting and saving for my leave (trying to cover bills for when I'm not working), that finding extra money for things like a infant bathtub, no scratch mittens, crib sheets, a mobile, an extra diaper bag, etc, is seemingly impossible. Not just that, but finding extra money for extra groceries so I can have freezer meals ready. Yeah, not sure sure how I'm going to do that. I can't expect Cyndi to be able to fill in that gap as far as paying for food when she's here helping... Don't get me started on where the extra money for helping her even GET here to see Lex will come from....

I definitely want to nest but after work I'm so tired, even thinking of cleaning more makes me want to scream. My to do list seems never ending, and while most of it I can do myself, I can't do it all. The nursery is almost ready, but I still have clothes to wash and sort and figure out my storage space for everything.

Ken and I still have to figure out the car seats, which also means cleaning out at least his car. I'd really like the stroller put together and ready before he's here too, in case I need to use it for whatever reason before Ken's 10 days of leave is up. I need to make Andy a small bag for Lex in case of emergencies. 

Thinking about all this makes my head want to explode!! And obviously trying to think about all of this at the same time is more than a little overwhelming. I'm trying to tackle the to do list as an every other week or something pace, so it's not too crazy. And I guess I have to suck it up and do at least something after work every day, since weekends will be nonexistent pretty much until Lex gets here. Oiy......

32 weeks

Late getting to this, but I thought I'd start anyway, at least every time I blog until I deliver.

How far along: 32 weeks, 3 days

How big is baby: weighs 3 3/4 pounds and is about 16.7 inches long

I have been feeling: Stressed and worried. We have nothing set up or ready yet, my house feels messy, and the urge to nest is hard to control. I don't want to nest too much yet since I have nothing ready, which is frustrating. Ken is also looking for a new job, and that coupled with our already strained finances is worrisome. Also super tired! Running out of energy very quickly now.

Total weight gain/loss? about 12ish pounds I think

Maternity clothes? I think I'm set. I have work pants, jeans, and 6 tops. The nylon or whatever on my pants gets annoying after several hours though.

Sleep? Getting better actually, but I still toss and turn a lot. 

Best moment this week? Getting plans ready for my first maternity shoot this weekend

Food cravings? Haven't had any for a while, but overall during the pregnancy it has been fried chicken, chocolate milk, fries, and pretzels.

Food aversions?  mustard and peanut butter

Gender? Boy all the way!

Labor signs? not that I'm aware of. Braxton Hicks jut recently started

Belly button in or out? Still in, but creeping towards an outie now

What I miss? sleeping on my stomach, so much!

What I'm looking forward to? My baby shower on the 13rd

I'm worried about: Finances, getting the nursery ready, all the stuff we have left to do.

Bump? Getting pretty big at this point

Next appointment: This Friday, July 5th.

Week 32!