Disappointment

Not going to lie, I was pretty disappointed yesterday. My period came yesterday with full vengeance, and my heart sunk a little (a lot) at the sight. No baby this month. I was trying not to be optimistic, that whole saying of Ken's "Expect the worst, hope for the best", but I couldn't help but be a little optimistic and I was excited to test since nothing had happened yet. On Saturday we talked about pregnancy testing at the end of this week... Well that solved itself I guess. This entire process and ordeal over the last almost 8 months is so frustrating! I hate that I feel anger toward this situation and our struggles, but I can't help but be pissed off and hurt that Ken and I do not have a baby yet. Why is this so difficult? Why can't the one thing we want most in life go right? I honestly hate this.