Depression

With everything that has happened in the last 2 weeks, I honestly think I'm slightly depressed. It has been a horrible past 2 weeks, between baby stuff, the D&C confusion, and crap at work and being stressed out there (I honestly thought it would help take my mind off of things, but it only made it worse), I don't know how much more I can take. Yesterday was by far the worst day. I physically felt the weight of my stress and worries, and no matter what I tried to do, I couldn't get out of my funk. I know that God won't bring me to it if He can't being me through it, but things just seem so bleak right now. Ken and I are both still worried about our finances (him moreso than I, but that's just Ken) and things at work are so stressful. It's hard to even come up with the words of what I'm feeling right now.
I'm still petrified about the D&C (which is now scheduled for this Thursday the 7th) but I'm so petrified of doing the TTC again after a couple months. I'm going to be freaking out probably the entire pregnancy, worried about the heartbeat and whether or not it's a missed miscarriage again. How can I not freak out about it? Everything seemed hunky dory and in a quick 15 minutes at the OB office my dream is gone, ripped out from beneath my feet. It's still so hard to say "Actually, I'm not pregnant". I think that's what hurts the most, having to say those words, not trying to explain what happened, just the fact that I can't say I'm pregnant anymore.
My support during this difficult time has been amazing, and I don't know what I'd do without my mom, Ken, my family, Leslie, Jared, Langley, Mrs. B, and everyone else who has given me comfort, encouragement, and support. Thank you to everyone, it means the world.
I guess I just don't know where to go from here. The unknowns of the future freak me out, and scare me, but there is nothing I can do about it. I'm still trying to live life, which is so weird to me, but life doesn't stop for hardship. I know that I need to grieve, but how can I truly grieve while still having to live life? I think as with a lot of other things, I say or think things in my head, but suppress the emotion and then life gets in the way and I never truly deal with it. I'm trying to grieve and give myself time emotionally, but how? No one tells you these things, it's just you have to stumble through it the best you can and try to come out on the other side healed.