Again?

I have a small suspicion that I had another miscarriage. I woke up on Wednesday morning, getting ready for work, and I've noticed over the past 3 months of TTC, my periods have been pretty heavy, heavier than they ever were before I was pregnant or anything. So I'm going through the motions, and pottying, and there were clots. They had a weird look to them, more solid than normal period clots would be, or that I've seen periods before. It strangely resembled the after effects of my first miscarriage, but I never had any cramping, and definitely not the "wringing me in half" type cramps from my first miscarriage.

I guess I'll never know. My August period started on the 27th, and so did my Sept, so I was technically a day before being late. I never took a test though, I was waiting to be a few days late before I used my last test.
I never knew I would struggle this much with trying to have a baby. Who knew that TTC was so stressful, so worrysome? Ken and I had a fight last night, that started mild and progressed into deeper issues. Ken has this weird idea that I don't love him any more, that I'm only putting up with him so that I can have a baby. TTC and this baby loss has definitely put a strain (although mild) on our marriage, and I hate that. I know we're fine, and marriage is always a work in progress, but both being depressed and the emotional strain of this is difficult. Why do we have to struggle? Why is the one thing we both want so badly the thing we are having the most trouble with? I guess I just want a little understanding, some questions answered once and for all.