Ken told me around Christmas, that for my Christmas present, he wants me to take out my birth control and we can start trying for another baby. I want a 2nd baby. We are finally at an decent financial situation, so having a baby isn't difficult or unreasonable.
I'm scared of it being too difficult going from 1 to 2 children. I'm terrified of having a similar birth experience. My son was 9 days late, and an emergency c section after his heart rate dropped into the 60s at only 5 cm dilated. I'm nervous about how to balance full time work, 2 kids, a house, a husband, and still maintain myself and not lose "me". My son is my world, and I know he will be a great big brother, once he understands (he would be 4 when we have the baby if there are no complications).
I would love a baby. I loved being pregnant. But all of the unknowns are making me scared and not sure if it's a good idea.